Post Holiday Traumatic Stress Enema
By the time Christmas rolls around each December, I feel like I’ve lived it a thousand times. I’m usually working right up until the end, and I’ve been known to nod off on Christmas Eve before dessert is served. That’s the funny thing about working in retail or the service industry.
For most in the “public sector,” by the time you get off work–you’ve heard enough about Dean Martin’s wishing a white holiday, you’ve shaken enough egg nog martinis, you’ve wrapped plenty of other peoples’ presents, you’ve had enough holiday cheer cross the line into holiday mirth and holiday over-consumption…. In short, you’re done. It’s like working the “It’s a Small World” ride at Disneyworld, probably don’t want to hear that tune on your days off. By the time you get to hoist a cup of nog, you’re over it; you’re happy to have made it through to the other side and you don’t want Santa Baby following you there.
One of my sisters-in-law called me a Christmas “gloomy-gloom” the other day, and it really bugged me. I’m no more a “grump,” I guess, than millions of Jews, Muslims, and Buddhists that have to put up with the red and green consumer orgy every year. Remember when you’re razzing a friend or family member in the service industry about not being in the “holiday spirit,” that they are so covered in the holiday spirit, so steeped in it they’re shitting it–so much more so than your lights on the garage and Christmas sweater–that you couldn’t possibly ever understand.
You could empathize by recreating the scene from A Clockwork Orange, only with It’s a Wonderful Life on a loop and Carols on eleven and, every once in a while, someone shouting at you why you’re out of their favorite Scottish breakfast tea that they come here to buy every year and they just might not come back so there, every 10 minutes. And a parade of screaming babies and, hell, mommies too–complete with strollers that nip your ankles every five seconds. You might get the idea come hour five.
But it’s just so much easier to tell them it’s good to see them and make them a right and proper stiff drink. Then find them a spot on the couch.
Holidays One and Two down, one more to go. Obligatory public service announcement from moi:
Don’t be an asshole. Don’t drink and drive. It’s so white trash.
December 28th, 2005 at 3:54 pm
Everyone here at the restauarant is emailing this post to their families. You say it so much calmer than I ever could.
Day jobbers (we call them Daybobs) don’t get it. We love our jobs, but this time of year is a huge strain to be around the public, so much nervous, pent up, bad energy. So all we want for Christmas, is for it to be over.
Feliz Navidad.
Bill
December 28th, 2005 at 3:56 pm
As someone who lives in the burbs of LA, Burbank to be exact, I agree. Drinking and driving is white trash.
This season, if you want to use party as a verb, hire a limo. Wait, that’s still too trashy. Try a town car instead. Now that’s classy. Though they probably will charge you if you toss your New Year’s cookies.
December 28th, 2005 at 3:58 pm
Americans aren’t very good at empathy.
Or most people wouldn’t be such assholes this time of year. That’s why I hate it. Everyone is so hell bent on having a Merry fucking Xmas, they blaze a trail of rude, boarish behavior to get there. And we’re the ones stuck cleaning up the shit, or taking it.
December 29th, 2005 at 7:04 pm
My mom gets on me for screaming when I go into a store and Jingle bell rock strolls into my ears. I fucking hate that music now, which makes me sad, because once upon a time it made me quite happy. But since this one channel of Muzak has sliced and diced all the halfway decent christmas carols into something shitty like the best of Bing, frank, dean, I want to mutulate it. I’m suprised more people aren’t offended by the holidays. Everyone gets offended so easily these days that one would think that a whole 3 months (it starts the day after halloween and we all know it) of christmas hell might offend some that dno’t believe. Evidently everyone is afraid to go up against the christmas monster. And who could blame them. christmas nay-sayers don’t have a chance. I’m tired of cleaning up christmas shit. i think bill said it best. “all i want for christmas is, for it to be over.” God damn right. sorry this is so long
March 19th, 2007 at 3:13 pm
Wines.mobi unveiled a free wine internet service.
It can be accessed practically on any gadget connected to the web: cell phones, PDAs, laptops, Blackberries, etc.
Wines.mobi is currently providing data on more than 27,000 bottles of wine from all over the world. Wine database contains data on wines from 1860s to 2007.
There’s also a link to the wine rating page with a complete description of the wine rating scales.
The website was designed to assist both wine professionals and wine novices.
As long as you are connected to the web you can quickly check and compare the ‘street price’ and the wine rating of practically any wine bottle on your gadget. With this service you get an upper hand dealing with the wine store. They’ll never take to the cleaners!
The service is free!
Here’s the examples of searches you can run on the system:
Wines
Red Wines
White Wine
Australian Wine
California Wine