OK, I have an answer (freakin finally) to my Cheerwine cane sugar v. high fructose corn syrup dilemma. Chuck McMahan from North Carolina tells me that Cheerwine in plastic and can is made with the evil corn syrup. While Cheerwine in GLASS bottles is made with good, old-fashioned cane sugar. Thanks Chuck! Oh, and the Tar Heels suck.

Don’t know about Cheerwine: Cheerwine, Say It Isn’t So! (original post)

Has anyone seen the Halloween advent calendar? What a brilliant idea. You could make an advent calendar for anything, actually. Say, a count down to the presidential election…

The Daily Show Indecision 2008 advent calendar–with a snarky politcal fact behind every window. November 2nd’s truffle would be Lorazapam mocha cream, to help you better cope with election results.

Ooh! What about the New Year’s resolution advent calendar–as the month goes on, the chocolates get smaller and smaller. January 31st would be a laxative.

Or there’s the Festivus advent calendar–When you order it online, you can add your own messages to air a different grievance each day with your loved one!

I came up with a few more, but even I deem them inappropriate.

Borsci San Marzano Elisir - Ancient Middle Eastern herbs and spices make this Italian apperitif truly unique. You know how sometimes, please forgive me, a Coca-Cola just tastes so damn good? Well, this liquour is kinda like that. Spicy, a little sweet, a hint of cinnamon, cardamom? Is that bergamot? Shit I don’t know. All I know is when I rolled into their factory in Puglia I had a raging hangover. Then I drank a Borsci and coke on the rocks and I was right as rain. Then they fed us a five course brilliant meal, with the crowning moment a tiramisu (made with the elixir-I say goddamn!), and shots of the Elixir, limoncello, and their caffe liquour (puts Kahlua to shame). And the cycle started all over again. Oi, takes me back. I just about jerkied myself that week, I tell you.

(*You can order Borsci San Marzano Elixir from www.samswine.com or contact your local Winebow rep. Unless you live in a puritanical, bitch-ass state like Washington. Then you’ll have to special order it.)

Geezh, what’s with all the swearing? I had to go to the doctor today. Got a flu shot. I’ve never had a flu shot. I mentioned AFTER the shot that I didn’t want to get sick again like last week.

The nurse said, “You were sick last week? Oh. You might have a reaction, then.”

“Can you describe the reaction, ma’am?” I asked.

“Well, you might experience flu-like symptoms.”

W.T.F.

Nothing flu “like” about barfing your guts out. I’d say that’s pretty much the goddamn moe foe flu to me. And that’s my good samaritan duty for the day. Beware, dear readers……..