Too much of a snob to drink shit wine at your friends’ wedding? Me too. But only an asshole would make a stink about it. There are small steps you can take to make that oak jerky Chardonnay taste great tolerable.

Crappy Wine Doesn’t Have To Be So Bad
in this issue of the Seattle Weekly

I got emails on this article saying “just drink beer.” Yeah, well, I could, but when some of we ladies are dolled up and sucking in the gut, we don’t want want to pee every 20 minutes or feel like a camel with its hump on backwards.

I’m always paranoid that people are waiting for some kind of comment from me about the wine. Well, not paranoid exactly, because they usually are waiting for me to say something. Crap wine I’ve learned to abide. 1.) Because no one likes a Smarty at their party. 2.) More than 4 hours of open bar gets me in trouble. 3.) It’s just not that important to me.

And it shouldn’t be that important to you. You are at a wedding, most likely with people you love. Quit thinking about the wine, jackass, and enjoy yourself.