It’s another one of those holidays where every wine writer sees fit to come up with a new angle for pairing the juice with a salty, optionally maple-glazed Easter ham. (yawn) My advice? You’re already consuming so much salt, fat, and sugar… drink whatever you want. (But when in doubt, go with pink or off-dry bubbles)

But what about that other holiday? Eh hem. You know, Passover? Christians make a big deal about Chanukah because it happens around Christmas (and involves presents). But just like Christmas, Passover is the one holiday that most Jewish famalies will celebrate, regardless of how often they visit the synagogue.

Passover signifies the start of the harvest season and refers to God’s “passing over,” or sparing, the houses of Jews when he slayed the firstborn sons of Egypt. In the strictest of Passover rituals, the home is cleansed of all things having to do with chametz, or leavened bread products. This is a symbol of the Jews leaving Egypt in a hurry, not having time to let their bread rise. It’s also a symbol of removing the pride or arrogance from one’s soul.

In most modern homes, this practice has turned to the exclusive serving of Matzah during the weeklong holiday. Matzah (or matzo) is flour and water only, cooked very quickly, looks like a cracker. You never see wine pairing articles about the Passover seder, mainly because of the complex, somber rituals associated with the dinner: the retelling of the Exodus from Egypt, blessings using wine, matzah, symbolic foods like bitter herbs, and hand washing.

I am omni-denominational. Meaning, I’ll participate in any religious holiday with good food. But whenever I’ve been invited to a Passover seder, I’ve been completely humbled. The dinner to me, not knowing much about the religion, has a beauty, simplicity, and carefulness that I can only compare to a Japanese tea ceremony. Both of which can make you feel like a bafoon, not knowing what you’re supposed to do.

Why am I rambling about this? Well, I guess all those Cadbury cream eggs and gigormous freako choco-bunnies get me thinking… What is ritual? What is habit? What is compelled consumerism? The Jews still remember the Exodus by a ritual of abstinence. The Christians remember the resurrection of Jesus Christ their savior with lent, but also with 20 pound honey-glazed hams and dyed, chocolate-filled, candied egg thingies. And peeps.

Passover and Easter used to be hot competitors, back in the day. And by day, I mean 300 A.D. The Last Supper is believed to have been the Passover seder. Not wanting Easter to be overshadowed by Passover, early Christian head honchos decided to make it a moveable feast, tied to the lunar calender. (Sunday after the first full moon, after the vernal equinox) This got other head X-honchos’ robes in a twist (lunar=pagan!). What would those holy dudes think now? Other bizarre derivations of the Easter holiday: In Norway, it’s traditional to solve murders. Solving crime? That used to be a euphamism for something much different when I was in college. In the Czech Republic, they get their BDSM on: whipping is a Easter Monday tradition. Huh.

It was one of the Grimm brothers, Heath I think, who linked the tradition of the Easter bunny with the pagan goddess Ostara, or Eostre. Egg giving at festivals goes way back. And the Christians were always trying to convert pagans by allowing them to keep (cough, cough co-opting, cough) their more harmless rituals.

In Japan, savvy co-opting pop culture masters that they are, holidays often get a further morphing. One of the craziest things I’ve ever seen? Santa, crucified amidst ladies footwear in the window of an upscale department store. Oh where oh where will these holidays be 300 years from now?